Period Products Aren't "Sexual"

Nor are they a "luxury" but that's another blog post waiting to be written.

Now, I’m not sure if this is still a thing that people believe, but I had a comment awhile ago about how a girl lived with her grandma, and because the grandma believed tampons would interfere with her granddaughter’s virginity she didn’t want to buy them for her. But thankfully, she was able to find a pamphlet to show her grandma. 

I remember before I got my period listening to a friend talk about tampons in a “sexual” way, and it really weirded me out and din’t make sense to me. I was still very naive, but I just had this feeling that she was making it up. 

And of course she was. I have never since heard someone describe a menstrual product as feeling "nice" in that way (if you catch my drift). 

And if you’ve ever used a tampon, cup or sponge, you know there’s nothing sexual about all of these things. Yeah, they can feel more "comfortable" if you go from pads to tampons or cups. But not sexually "nice" in that way. Quite the opposite I think. 

Back when tampons first went on the market, religious parents were concerned that they would cause their daughter to think sinful thoughts. Kind of makes you want to laugh and hit your head on the table at the same time doesn’t it? 

We know that’s not true, but let’s move on to this very confusing idea of virginity, and how it relates to menstrual products. I'm only going to dip my toes into the topic today.

I remember when I was in high school discussing this idea of virginity with my friends, and what we thought “counted” and didn’t. Which is pretty silly looking back. 

The “concern” with period products and virginity is that using a tampon or cup could “pop your cherry” or break/tear you hymen. Or I remember the myth that more sexually active girls had to use "super" or "super plus" tampons. Which if know how a vagina works, know that's false. 

Here's a funny video that explains the hymen. 

Now, there are different “types” of hymens.

A normal (which is the most common) hymen stretches around the outside of the vaginal opening in one way or another, leaving most of the opening clear. Then there are imperforate, microperforate, and septate hymens which all stretch across the vaginal opening in one way or another, which can get in the way of not only tampons and cups, but block the release of menstrual blood, which isn't good. 

Now, don’t let this freak you out when it comes to trying a cup or tampon. There is a learning curve when it comes to using these period products. 

But I’ve made a few videos about these. One about tampons tips, another about tampon tips, and one about cup tips (my menstrual product of choice). 

But if you don't want to take the time to go watch those videos (you should) my biggest pieces of advice are:

+ get a hand mirror and check out what’s going on down there because it’s impossible to put a tampon/cup in a place you have no idea where it is.

+ don’t try to put in or take out a dry tampon, which can be tricky, but swirl the tampon/cup around the opening of your vagina before inserting because it will pick up some fluid that will act as a glorious lubricant and relieve you of some awful feeling friction.

+ stay calm, nothing is going anywhere if you’re clenching your muscles.

+ and finally, no, your vagina is not a black hole that things can get lost in (your cervix stops that from happening).  

And, just remember this, tampons and cups have nothing to do with your sexuality or virginity. They are just part of life as a lady.  

I Didn't Bleed On My Bed This Month + Other Small Victories

I write a lot about periods. Some say I share a few too many details about my period. Like last month, when I shared a story of how I bled through a few pairs of pants, yet still keep a positive attitude about my period. 

I've bled through underwear, multiple pairs of pants, onto my bedding, through my bedding and into the mattress, on chairs, but I still love my period. 

I'm a bit of a freak, I know 

But you’ll be happy to know that I at least didn’t bleed onto my bed this past month. 

However, I think I did still make my way through three pair of pants (at different times throughout the day), and one high top chair (thankfully the chair was black wood, and easily wiped off). 

But do you know what I did accomplish this past cycle? I did a great job of listening to my body, that's what. 

I stopped allowing myself regular naps after I graduated from college, but I always find myself really craving a nap here or there during my period. 

And this past period I let myself take at least one nap. I mean, it was only 15 minutes, but that was a big thing for me. 

Something about stopping what I’m doing in the middle of the day to allow myself to lay down makes me feel guilty. 

Over the past few years, as I’ve learned about my body I’ve learned you HAVE to let yourself slow down during your period. It makes it SO MUCH BETTER. When you listen and just do what your body is telling you through each phase period life is so much easier, and much more pleasant.

This combined with getting off the pill, changing my diet and switching to reusable menstrual products has not only changed my actual period, but has changed how I feel about it. 

I highly recommend trying this out. 

And then when you do bleed through your favorite pair of jeans or onto your white sheets, you aren’t angry and hateful towards your period. You’re forgiving and understanding. 

What are you tricks when it comes to getting along with your period? 

Can You Chart Your Cycle While on Hormonal Birth Control?

Towards the end of your journey with hormonal birth control you may be wondering, can I start charting while still on it, while I learn the in’s and out’s of FAM. Here’s my answer for you — Yes, and No. 

Boo. I know. What a boring answer, but stick with me.

Here's why you “can’t” chart your cycle while still on hormonal birth control: 

+ your chart isn’t going to look right...

+ most forms of hormonal birth control keep you from ovulating so there won’t be that spike in temperature

+ because your body is being tricked into essentially thinking it’s pregnant you probably won’t notice a big change in your cervical fluid while you’re on it.

But, in better news, Yes! Start charting your cycle as you end your relationship with hormonal birth control:

+ practice taking your temperature, checking your fluid and marking it on your chart

+ get in the habit of doing this. Every. Single. Day.

+ educate yourself before taking the leap

+ if you have a partner, get them on board

+ find a supportive group, even if that’s online (#femmehead)

+ and finally get excited to have a menstrual cycle again, and a real period

So, while you can’t technically chart your cycle because you won’t have those changes in fertility signs, you can darn well start practicing and get comfy in your new lifestyle change.  And if you're even more curious about this transition — keep your eye open for my new course, all about coming off  hormonal birth control, which I'm looking to debut in early 2017.