FAM Misconceptions + Mistakes

Women don’t want to move backwards. We want to move forward, into a time of knowledge and education, into a time where we can combine research and technology to find the best possible birth control option that works for us and our bodies.

Birth control is not a one size fits all thing. What works for me might now work for you. We don’t have cookie cutter perfect cycles, and that’s OK. That’s part of having a cycle. The exciting part, the empowering part comes from learning about your unique cycle and what you can do to work with your body to control your fertility in a way that fits with your life. 

So, while you’ll probably never hear me promote hormonal birth control options you’ll never hear me say that women shouldn’t have the option to choose them. Just like women should have the access to the actual information about FAM. 

Today I want to go over some misconceptions about FAM as well as some common FAM mistakes. 

So, what are some things one might hear about FAM? 

     + that it’s too hard

     + not effective enough

     + inconvenient (can’t have spontaneous sex)

     + we’re not smart enough to use it correctly 

     + all FABM’s (fertility awareness based methods) are lumped together

     + media confuses it with the Rhythm Method

It’s one of my main frustrations but the media regularly confuses FAM with the Rhythm Method. Which if you’ve learned anything about modern forms of FAM you know it’s very different. FAM has a perfect use rate comparable to the pill, but because all FABM’s get lumped together it takes the effectiveness rate down, because the Rhythm Method is often included in that. 

Seriously, if you go Google "Rhythm Method” right now, in the top right corner will pop up “Fertility awareness, also called: The Rhythm Method”. 

(Internal Scream) It’s not the same thing! 

Whenever you hear people (who know what FAM is) talk about it they’re usually talking about a combined method (like the Sympto-Thermal Method) where you track your basal body temperature, cervical fluid and optional cervical position on a daily basis and apply that to the rules of the method to determine where you are in your cycle and fertility. 

The Rhythm Method is based on the length of your cycle. Oh and assumes everyone has a perfect 28 day cycle and ovulates on day 14. 

Let’s move on to the “too hard”, “too time consuming” part of FAM. 

It does take a few cycles to learn, but once you know the information it doesn’t take more than a few minutes each day. Seriously I’m more in tune with and educated about my menstrual cycle and fertility now (not to mention more diligent and safe) than I was when I was taking the Pill. 

As for “spontaneous sex” people really need to widen their definition of what sex is. There are a lot of lovely sexual acts that don’t involve actual intercourse (penis in vagina), and these should be a part of your repertoire anyways. Plus there are condoms and other non-hormonal barrier methods available for those 6-7 days you have to avoid unprotected sex. 

Alright, let’s talk about some mistakes. 

+ not taking temperature consistently

     - not taking it at the same time

     - not taking it first thing when you wake up

     - lounging in bed for awhile before you take it, even though you haven’t actually gotten out of bed

     - not taking it every day

     - not taking it with a BBT thermometer

+ not following the rules/not learning them

     - don’t just read a few articles online

     - at least read a book like Taking Charge Of Your Fertility

     - best to then back that up with taking a course (online or in person)

[Shameless self plug: I offer an easy to digest Chart Your Cycle course]

+ not learning an actual method (creating a Frankenstein method)

     - i’ve had a few people comment on stuff saying FAM is crap, but then they go on to explain some frankenstein method that they’ve concocted

     - you should learn how to correctly take your BBT and check your fluid, choose a method and learn the rules to that method, and follow them

     - ovulation test strips should not be a part of your birth control plan

          + perfectly OK if you’re trying to conceive

          + and if you’re curious

+ apps are great, but you should learn the rules and implement them yourself rather than relying on what the app tells you

     - it’s best to choose an app that doesn’t have fertility prediction because they might sway your thoughts against what your signs are actually saying

          + I’m currently using Kindara, which allows you to input all of your data into a chart, draw a coverline, etc.

     - unless it’s an app like NaturalCycles, Daysy or LadyComp that has the algorithms, data and research to back it up

     - What I’m saying is don’t rely on predictions in simple period tracking apps as birth control

+ calendar methods, methods that don’t use fertility signs

     - don’t guess when your fertile phase based on past cycles

     - it’s not about the number of days, it’s about taking your temperature and fluid every day to calculate fertility 

+ only casually tracking temperature

     + don’t underestimate the importance of cervical fluid (it’s the greatest indicator of fertility and where you are in your cycle)

     + it is much more telling to me than temperature is

     + temperature only tells you when you’ve ovulated and when you’ve started a new cycle

     + using a temp-only method after you have realized you can’t track your fluid is one thing. But I think women should be learning how to and tracking both if they can. Especially at first

Phew! Ok I know that’s probably a lot to digest, and I may have gotten a little ranty at times, but hopefuly you get the gist. 

You are smart enough to safely use FAM if you so desire. 

It’s based on science, not some hippy, woo woo seance. 

Normal people like you and me use it. 

Do you use FAM? Have you considered it? Let me know down below. 

Learn the Method Before Relying On a Device

I’ve been getting a lot of messages and questions from gals looking to quit their hormonal birth control and they want to know what I recommend when it comes to Daysy, Natural Cycles, Wink and things like that. 

And I’ll share my thoughts but I always start with highly recommending learning something like the sympto-thermal method (STM) before relying solely on a device or app.

I can’t begin to explain the benefits of understanding the method, your fertility and all of that before you pick up a device. 

You can go the old school way of using a paper chart as you learn and practice the sympto-thermal method, but I prefer doing my charting on the Kindara app. (I’m not sponsored, I just really love their app).

I love that it doesn’t give you predictions, and is basically a paper chart in an app. You have to input all of your data, draw your coverline, choose your peak day plus you can add custom data as well. 

A lot of people assume charting, FAM and STM are complicated and hard to learn. And therefore they want the security of a device so they don’t have to rely on just themselves. 

But I sincerely believe that anyone who wants to learn how to chart can do it successfully. 

The recommended timeline is three cycles to get the hang of it before relying on just the STM. I remember when I first started seeing what I had read and learned about play out in my own cycle and on my own chart. 

Not only was it just really cool, but it was super empowering. And yes you can get a similar sensation from using a device, but I don’t really quite think it’s the same as when you’ve learned the method and implemented it on your own. 

A lot of the devices and apps I’ve seen are based on temperature-only methods, which is fine, and there’s definitely a place for it, but I have so much more confidence in the STM because there is both temperature and fluid to cross check each other. 

Cervical fluid is this amazing indicator of fertility, and there is so much that I would miss out on if I wasn’t charting it. I can tell how hydrated I am that cycle by how much fluid I have. If my temperature is off because of travel, sleep, sickness, stress, you name it I have my fluid to cross-check my chart with to make sure I’m being safe. It's an added security that makes me more confident in the method rather than if I was just charting my temperature. 

So, yes, there have been some cool advances in technology, which is awesome and something I hope to see continue in the future. But I really do believe that you’re better off, in the long run, learning the sympto-thermal method before relying on a device. 

If you’re ready to learn STM and start charting, I’ve created just the course for you. 

Chart Your Cycle is for those new to FAM, and the STM. I teach you how to chart, about your different phases and the four FAM rules, which will give you the perfect foundation of knowledge to start charting. 

When did you start charting, and why do you recommend it?

Different Types of Fertility Awareness Based Methods

I wanted to write this today because I think there is a big misconception when people hear about charting or Fertility Awareness. There’s this assumption that it all means the same thing, when in fact there are quite a few methods within the umbrella of FAM. 

Today I’m going to share 8 different methods, as shown in Taking Charge of Your Fertility, the fertility signs used within that method as well as the effectiveness. All of this will hopefully show you that there are a lot of options (good and bad) within Fertility Awareness based methods. And you can see why lumping all of these together as FAM will give you inaccurate results for “effectiveness”. 

Sympto-Thermal Method (STM) FAM/NFP

Fertility Signs Used: Cervical fluid and waking temperature (option to chart cervical position as well). 

Effectiveness: This is considered the most comprehensive and reliable method because the two signs must corroborate each other before you’re considered safe (it’s the method taught in TCOYF and what I teach in Chart Your Cycle). It’s on par with the effectiveness of the Pill.

A method where two of three signs are observed, in addition to optional secondary signs.

BBT Method (Basal Body Temperature)

Fertility Signs Used: Waking Temperature

Effectiveness: very effective but only after ovulation

The days before ovulation aren’t safe for unprotected sex because the rise in temp only indicates you’re safe after ovulation. But it is an option for those that can’t rely on their cervical fluid patterns. 

Justisse Method

Fertility Signs Used: Cervical fluid (option of waking temp or cervical position)

Effectiveness: just like with Creighton and Billings (below) it’s effective because it uses fluid, but unlike those other two you have the option to chart your waking temp and cervical position which can make it as effective as the sympto-thermal method.

It’s similar to Creighton model since it uses almost the same descriptions of fluid. It also provides holistic health-care support to women having different types of hormonal problems. 

Creighton Model System (CrMS)

Fertility Signs Used: Cervical fluid

Effectiveness: quite effective like Billings because cervical fluid is most important sign to observe when charting to avoid pregnancy, but you don’t get temp shift to confirm ovulation. 

It’s also called fertility care system. It’s similar to billings but uses extremely precise and standardized description of fluid.

Billings Ovulation Method

Fertility Signs Used: Cervical fluid

Effectiveness: quite effective because fluid is most important sign to check when avoiding pregnancy naturally, but you don’t have the added benefit of a temp shift to confirm ovulation so it’s not as effective as STM.

The classic and first method in which only fluid is observed.

Two-Day Method

Fertility Signs Used: Cervical fluid

Effectiveness: You don’t have the benefit of temp shift to confirm ovulation since rules aren’t as strict as other methods that observe fluid it may not be as effective

It’s a simplified version of Billings Ovulation Method. It asks whether you observed a secretion the day before or that day. If it’s yes to either you’re considered fertile. It doesn’t differentiate between types of fluid so it’s easy to apply. 

Cycle Beads

Fertility Signs Used: None

Effectiveness: same as Standard Days Method (below)

Cycle beads are simple braclet of beads that can be used with the Standard Days Method. But it’s easy to get confused with what day you're on because there are no dates on the beads. Because of this, an actual calendar would be more effective to use with Standard Days. 

Standard Days Method

Fertility Signs Used: None

Effectiveness: It can be effective for those with consistent cycle lengths, but like the Rhythm Method (below) it doesn’t involve charting fertility signs day to day so it doesn’t account for an abnormal ovulation. It’s only recommended for women who are spacing their kids or would be OK with surprise pregnancy. 

It’s similar to the rhythm method and couples avoid unprotected sex during presumed fertile phases of days 8-19 if she has consistent cycles between 26-32 days.

Rhythm Method

Fertility Signs Used: None

Effectiveness: It’s unreliable because it doesn’t involve observing any fertility signs day to day, so it doesn’t take into account an abnormal ovulation. 

It’s an out of date method that uses past cycle lengths to predict future fertile phases. Not recommended. 

I hope you can see from this that there is an array of options for charting. And that methods like the Rhythm Method is very different from the Sympto-Thermal Method. 

What’s your preferred method? 

How Charting Can Help You Know You're Pregnant

I absolutely love that FAM can be used for a number of things including natural birth control, learning more about your body, and to get pregnant. Today, I thought it would be interesting for me to share a few of the ways in someone who charts may know they’re pregnant sooner than someone who doesn’t. 

The first obvious one for me is that if you chart then you know the average length of your cycle and you know the different lengths it’s fluctuated between.

Now, there are plenty of women who don’t chart that probably know around when to expect their next period, but there are also a countless number who couldn’t answer the questions of how long an average cycle was or when their last period was (that was 100%  me before I started charting). 

And knowing when you should be starting a new cycle can let you know when to test for a possible pregnancy. And since you’re charting waking temperatures you can see the drop in temperature at the start of a new cycle. 

Moving on, you know when you ovulate, and whether you ovulated that cycle. Because obviously if you’re not ovulating you’re not going to get pregnant. You also know if you ovulated earlier or later than normal. 

Going along with that you know how long your luteal phase is (average is 14 days, but anywhere between 10 and 16 days is normal). Once you get past, or even close to that 16 day of your LP you know you can test. The luteal phase is rarely longer than 16 days unless the woman is pregnant. 

Because you’re charting your cervical fluid you know if you had sex on a fertile day that could result in a possible pregnancy. 

And finally, you know what’s normal for you, symptom wise leading up to your menstrual phase. And while a lot of pre-menstrual symptoms are quite similar to pregnancy symptoms, women who chart can have a better knowledge of what is normal because they can chart data beyond temperature and fluid. 

Now, I’ve never been pregnant so I can’t say any of this with experience, but these are the ways in which I could see charting coming in handy when it comes to knowing what’s normal for you and when to test. And it makes me curious for when the time does come for me (hopefully) how soon will I be able to tell?

And this doesn't even include all of the amazing ways charting can help you conceive a baby (or avoid it). 

If you’ve been pregnant, at what point did you know? Did you chart/practice FAM and did that play a role in you finding out sooner? 

The Good That Comes From Knowing Your Cycle

Where do I even start!?

I just filmed a video about a few reasons why I love my cycle, which I’ll link so you can go watch. 

An easy simple things that comes from charting is you know when your next period is supposed to come. And this comes in really hand when planning for travel, different events, etc. 

One of the biggest things that comes from charting, and knowing your cycle is that you know when you are fertile. And we all know this comes in really handy when you’re either trying to avoid pregnancy or when you’re trying to conceive a cute little munchkin. 

That will forever be one of the coolest things about FAM for me. That the same exact method is both a birth control method and a pregnancy achievement method. 

If something goes wonky with your cycle you know there’s something off in your body that needs to be taken care of, and you can then address it and heal it.  If you’re obvious to your cycle or suppressing it you might be missing out on something big that could be an easy fix but might cause you harm down the road. 

When you start tracking and charting you know what to expect, and it helps handle PMS and makes other cycle related things easier. For example, I don’t get angry about cramping anymore, I understand when and why I’m irritable, and I know why I’m tired and that I just need a quick 30 minute nap. 

When you learn about what happens to your body in the different phases you know how to better take care of your body and mind in each phase. For me this means being really social around ovulation, and sleeping more during your period 

It’s surprisingly such a good conversation piece to connect with other people who menstruate. You can compare cycles, offer advice, and talk about what you use during your period. 

When you get into the emotional and mental side of each phase you can dig even deeper into scheduling out your time. This is because you have different strengths and weaknesses in each phase that you can use to excel in life. 

Honestly, learning about how my cycle and my body works was one of the most amazing things I could have ever done for myself. It’s been empowering and enlightening and I want to share it with anyone who’s interested. 

For those of you out there ready to learn how to use the sympto-thermal method to understand more about your body and as a natural form of birth control you have a week left to sign up for my Chart Your Cycle course.

Embracing Your Body

#BodyPositive anyone? 

We’ve gotten a lot better recently with telling each other to love our bodies, but that’s easier said than done when we’re being bombarded with mixed messages from all angles. 

And that doesn’t even begin to include what preconceived notions of “beauty” we’ve been instilled with from childhood. 

So, how are we supposed to make peace with our bodies when we’re being told to “strive for a 'healthy' body” but “to love the body you already have”? 

I have no idea. And I don’t think it’s a one-sized fits all solution. But I can offer you my story.

I know, according to "society" I have a body type that is fitting with what others “strive" for. I’m not here to post photos of my thigh gap and tell you to eat your greens. 

I want to share two life changes that revolutionized the way I felt about my body.

I won’t get into how I used to grab at my “saddlebags” and wish for a perkier butt. 

But what’s it mean when someone who is “skinny” still feels they aren’t “there”. Who knows? 

Even the girls in the magazines don’t look like the girls in the magazines. (There’s a quote out there that is basically this). 

But moving right along. Those two changes:

Learning about my menstrual cycle and changing my diet (lifestyle). 

I know I’ve talked about these things before, but they are worth repeating over and over again. 

I don’t even know how to begin to explain the personal empowerment I discovered by ditching the pill, learning about how my body actually worked, and taking control of my own fertility. 

It made me realize how many myths there are about our fertility, our menstrual cycles, our minds and our bodies that are still prevalent today. 

Up until at least the age of 21 I didn’t know that a woman was only fertile for a few days out of every menstrual cycle. I seriously thought that we could get pregnant regardless of when we had sex. 

Knowledge is power, and that power feels good. 

I used to despise my period. It was annoying, unnecessary. It wasn’t fair that I had cramps and continuously ruined underwear. 

But when I discovered the magic behind the menstrual cycle, within the different phases and the purpose of the different functions, my world was rocked. 

No longer did I whine “Why me?!” when I cramped, but instead marveled at my body’s ability to do something without any effort from myself. To see what you are learning about play out in real life is quite incredible, and something I suggest for everyone. If there is something that frustrates you that you don’t understand, do some research. 

Moving along to my change in diet, or like I prefer to call it, lifestyle. Because diets seem to be pandered as temporary, quick fixes. Something you only have to do for a period of time before you can go back to what you were doing before. And frankly I think that’s a load of crap. 

I don’t understand how we can expect something that hasn’t been working to somehow work after we take a brief “health” hiatus from it. 

There's a quote that goes a little something like this: 

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.” 

Think of the number of fad diets you’ve seen out there that claim you can continue eating everything you love eating, you won’t have to exercise, but you’ll somehow be able to drop all those unwanted pounds?

Anything that is sold as “temporary” screams fake to me. 

The truth is so many of us don’t want to change our habits. We like what we’re doing, but we don’t like the results. We see a potential change as difficult or unenjoyable. 

“But I don’t want to eat just lettuce!"

We think that to maintain a healthy lifestyle and body we have to live in a world of deprivation when in reality for many it’s a world of abundance. 

When you cut out processed foods, animal products and focus on filling your stomach with a whole foods plant based diet you can (*gasp*) eat as much as you want. 

Discovering this world of abundance, energy and vibrance was incredible as a 21-year-old. 

Not only did my insides feel so much better (I had a lot of digestion issues before), but I started to feel better about my outward appearance as well. When you start treating yourself better in one aspect of your life it is infectious, and it spreads. 

Instead of grabbing at and complaining at my perceived imperfections I started noticing and appreciating what my body was capable of. 

If your biggest problem in life is that you don’t have a thigh gap or a flat stomach it’s time to take a step back and find the things about your body that you are grateful for. 

And even if it just starts with “I’m grateful I have two legs,” that’s something to be grateful for. Recently, I’ve been challenging myself physically, and I’m constantly aware of my gratitude that my body is able to run 10 miles, or complete a sprint triathlon. 

The moral of the story here is to find ways to nourish and enrich your body and life. Find gratitude in your days, in your abilities. Learn about your body, what makes you feel good and what doesn’t? And start doing more of what does make you feel good. 

For Those Who Are Worried About You Using FAM

It’s inevitable when some people find out you’re ditching the hormones and choosing a natural alternative. 

There is a lot of confusion around fertility, birth control and our options. 

So, when you get a lot of “But, you’re going to end up pregnant!” try not to get too frustrated. 

Think back to when you didn’t know there was another way, before you knew how our fertility actually works. 

Here’s how to have a polite conversation with someone who is “concerned” about you not being on hormonal birth control. 

Start by sharing some of your favorite FAM, cycle, period facts. Pique their curiosity. [This is where books like “Taking Charge of Your Fertility” and “The Pill: Are You Sure It’s For You?” come in handy]. 

+ Did you know that women are actually only fertile around 7 days each cycle? And that’s mostly because sperm can live in a fertile vagina for up to 5 days.

+ Hormonal birth control alters at least 150 different bodily functions. 

+ FAM is actually very different from the Rhythm Method, and when practiced correctly is over 98% effective.

Tell them why hormonal birth control wasn’t working for you, people are often shocked when you start listing off all the negative side effects you were experiencing and how you don’t have any of those since quitting. 

+ I developed mild depress, anxiety, chronic UTI’s, gained weight, and had a substantial decline in my dental health after starting the pill [just to name a few].

Give them a brief overview of how FAM works. That there are different fertility signs that you track every day and use that information alongside a set of rules and guidelines to determine whether you’re fertile or not. 

Make it clear that this isn’t a guessing game based on past cycles. It’s based in science and what is actually happening in your body. 

And in the end they still might not be on board, but if you continue forward with your journey, learning, practicing the method safely and essentially “prove them wrong” you’d be amazed. 

Sometimes still when I talk about not being on hormonal birth control and using FAM instead people will make some comment about pregnancy or how it doesn’t really work. And my calm comeback is that I have been using it successfully for over 4 years now, I know countless other women who use it too, and that I am much healthier and happier than I used to be. 

Not to mention I don’t ever plan on taking hormonal birth control again. 

At the end of the day it’s your body and your choice. You get to decide. 

[If you're curious about ditching the pill, and what all that entails, grab your spot in my upcoming Ditch the Pill course, which starts August 21st. And if you're ready to learn all about FAM, sign up for my Chart Your Cycle course, which begins August 16th!]

Too Scared to Ditch the Pill?

I was here at one point.

There was at least a year where I desperately wanted to get off the pill, but didn’t think there were any non-hormonal options that would actually work for me.

I tried to look back in my old journals to see if I talked about quitting the pill. But there’s nothing in there that I’ve found where I specifically mention the pill.

But there were so many eye-opening entries in there that are mind-boggling and heart breaking to read. Because of how bad I had gotten mentally and emotionally that last year.

I want to share just a few paragraphs from different entries to give you a grasp of that time in life. 

July 2, 2012

“I want to feel like I’m floating, like I’m flying, like I’m not here. How do I do that, how do I feel that? Free, like I don’t exist. Invisible like no one can see me. So no one notices me? I wish I were a bird. I would fly and fall, glide and soar. Free from life.” 

August 9, 2012

“I’m really proud of myself today. I ate an apple and fiber bar for breakfast. An apple for lunch and a tuna sandwich for dinner. Plus I went for a run with Bob (my dog), did a lower body workout, twice and cardio pilates once.

I still want some pills. I’m thinking Hydroxycut. I need to check out where I can pick some up.”

August 17, 2012

“Slowly slipping deeper into this shallow depression that is surrounding me. Little by little, further and further down I go. It’s comforting to be alone. Then there are no fake smiles, no fake laughs to force out of myself to please those around me. When I’m alone I can quietly slip away.”  

This is just a taste of what was in there and it always breaks my heart to read these old journals. To know and remember what I was going through. And to so clearly see it now, but to know that I was completely blind to it then. 

And I know I wasn’t alone in that. That there are still countless girls and women struggling today because of their hormonal birth control. Either unaware that there are other options or too afraid to get off it. 

And I just wish I could sit down with you. Give you a hug. Tell you that you can do it. That there is another way. 

But also that you shouldn’t feel pressured to jump off that cliff until you’re ready. 

So, you want to quit, but you’re too scared to? What to do?

Educate yourself. 

Build your community. 

You’re not alone in your desire for a different way. And you’re not the first to venture down this path. 

Start with some books, take a class or find an online educator.

Taking the time to learn the method thoroughly and completely will put you at ease and give you the confidence you need to take that leap. 

Yes, there’s the chance of pregnancy, but you take that risk with every single method of birth control you use. That’s the choice and risk you take when having sex with someone. 

But if you want to avoid pregnancy and use FAM I promise you are capable and responsible enough. 

There are condoms, there are copper IUD’s, there are new advances in technology to help make your non-hormonal birth control journey that much easier.

And let’s not forget that there are plenty of fun physical and sexual activities you can do with your partner without the risk and fear of pregnancy that comes with intercourse.

Sex doesn’t just mean intercourse, don’t forget that. It’s an exciting spectrum of things waiting for you to try out.

When you first discover you can quit your hormonal birth control and use a non-hormonal option like FAM, the prospect is terrifying. 

We have been led to believe for so long that we are incapable of controlling our own fertility. But that’s a lie. You are more than capable of doing just that. 

I promise the more you learn, the more you let it sink in, and the more you hear from those of us already doing it, the more ready you’ll be to join the club. 

[If you're ready but want someone to help guide you through the process, to talk about what that entails and what to expect, my Ditch the Pill course is perfect for you. Sign up now for the relaunch August 21st! If you're new to FAM and want to learn how to properly chart your cycle, snag your spot for my Chart Your Cycle course, which starts August 16th!]

How I Chart My Cycle | Natural Birth Control

One of the biggest misconceptions about charting your cycle is that there is only one way to do it.

And this is pretty limiting because if you believe this and think you don’t fall within that certain method that you can’t chart. 

But there are so many different, amazing methods, variations and not to mention all the new technological advances that have been made.

I really do believe that there is a method for everyone. 

I started with the sympto-thermal method, which combines temperature and fluid. In the beginning I also used paper charts before switching to charting apps. I then used a fluid-only method for awhile, then temperature-only with the Daysy. 

So, what have I currently settled on for my Goldilocks charting method? 

I use the sympto-thermal method combined with the Daysy fertility monitor. The reason I like this so much is because I get so much confidence and security from both the sympto-thermal method and Daysy separately. So, using them in conjunction with each other has been really reassuring. 

With the symptom-thermal method you take your basal body temperature every morning at the same time. Two rules to note beyond having to take it at the same time is that you have to do it first thing before getting out of bed, even before just hanging out in bed for 30 minutes before getting up. The other rule is that you have to take your temperature after at least four hours of sleep. 

I used to just take my BBT (basal body temperature) with a simple BBT thermometer from the drugstore. But since getting the Daysy, that has become my thermometer in every sense. 

Not only does it calculate your fertility on its own, it also provides you with a temperature (after syncing it to the app) that you can then use in a more traditional charting method. 

And I take that temperature from my Daysy each day and put it into the Kindara app on my phone, where I also chart my cervical fluid each day, along with a slew of other things. 

So each time I go to the bathroom I will quickly check my fluid before going to the actual bathroom. It takes an extra like 5-10 seconds. Easy.

Some days I wish the Daysy had a digital screen that displayed your temperature, but usually I don’t mind spending the extra 30-60 seconds it takes to sync it to the app in my phone where you can get the temperature. 

All in all I’m very happy with my current method, and I love knowing there are a variety of methods and technologies for charting. 

Charting my cycle has taught me so much about my body, and I love that I can use the same exact method when the time comes that I am ready to try and get pregnant. Which is when a lot of women first start learning about their menstrual cycle. 

[Disclaimer: This post does not teach you FAM. I mention how to take your temperature and fluid, but don’t mention any of the rules.]

[Use the code “FEMME” at checkout to save some money on your Daysy]

My Daysy + Its Role in My Birth Control

A quick little post today because I just wanted to come on here and talk about the Daysy fertility computer and how I've incorporated it into my birth control method.

I use the sympto-thermal method, which means I take my temperature and track my cervical fluid daily, and use those two fertility signs combined along with a particular set of rules and guidelines to know whether I am fertile or not. 

Before getting the Daysy I just used a simple basal body thermometer, which I recommend for anyone wanting to try out FAM to see if it’s right for you. 

There are so many different methods and tools to apply those methods that it’s really quite amazing how customizable FAM is to the individual lady. 

The Daysy alone is 99.3% effective just by taking your temperature. I like to combine it with also charting my cervical fluid. 

It takes a lot of that anxiety away that comes along with trusting your ability to know you fertility. 

FAM has legit changed my life and I really enjoy sharing my knowledge of the sympto-thermal method with other gals like myself. 

If you want to learn more about FAM and whether it’s a good fit for you (it is) you can take my Chart Your Cycle course which is now available as a PDF download. 

And if you want to snag a Daysy for yourself you can save some of your moolah (money) thanks to me. Just use the code FEMME at checkout. 

Don't Be Scared into Taking Hormonal Birth Control

It’s almost a right of passage to get on hormonal birth control these days. 

Not to mention it’s touted as a fix all cure for females.

Do you suffer from acne, irregular cycles, cramping, heavy periods, a fear of pregnancy — easy, just take the pill!

It’s handed over without any real warning of the possible negative side effects. Or I know it was for me, back in 2009. 

Now, I’m not telling everyone to go and throw out there hormonal birth control. But if you are fed up with the negative side effects, looking for a natural alternative, or curious about what else is out there — there are non-hormonal options that no one really talks about. 

And if you have recently come off HBC, or are ready to, but now find yourself seconding guessing your decision because of all this news about how every woman in America should go out and get an IUD — screw that. 

I understand that this is coming from a place of concern for women’s reproductive rights starting in 2017, but I don’t think it’s fair women are being scared into something that might not be right for them.

Now, if you are a lady who is on hormonal birth control and has no desire to change that any time soon, then sure, go out and get that IUD. You do you, boo. 

But if you don’t fall into that category, listen here.

There is an incredible community of women across the country and around the world who are supporting one another through love, understanding and knowledge. 

I am part of that community, and if you’re reading this you’re also a part of that community. 

I am here to support you, to share everything I know with you so you can make the best decision for yourself.

My goal is informed choices. I think the choices should be available to every woman, but that the necessary information should also be available so women can make informed decisions. These two things need to go hand in hand. 

If you want to start (or keep) using FAM as your birth control method of choice, I am here to support you with that decision. It has been an empowering choice I have lived with for over three years.

And once I got past those first few weeks of initial fear and wondering if I had made the right decision quitting the pill, I have never looked back.

It is such a freeing thing to be in control of your own fertility, and to basically put your middle finger up to those trying to take away women’s rights.

This is the time to come together as a community, to support and love one another with the decision we want to make. 

If you find yourself in this position of being scared about your fertility options going forward I am here for you. 

I invite you to email me, head to my contact page to send me a message, or comment on this post, and I will do my best to keep up with your messages.

I may not have all the answers, but I promise I can help instill a bit more confidence in yourself. And love — I’ve got plenty of that for you. 

Can You Chart Your Cycle While on Hormonal Birth Control?

Towards the end of your journey with hormonal birth control you may be wondering, can I start charting while still on it, while I learn the in’s and out’s of FAM. Here’s my answer for you — Yes, and No. 

Boo. I know. What a boring answer, but stick with me.

Here's why you “can’t” chart your cycle while still on hormonal birth control: 

+ your chart isn’t going to look right...

+ most forms of hormonal birth control keep you from ovulating so there won’t be that spike in temperature

+ because your body is being tricked into essentially thinking it’s pregnant you probably won’t notice a big change in your cervical fluid while you’re on it.

But, in better news, Yes! Start charting your cycle as you end your relationship with hormonal birth control:

+ practice taking your temperature, checking your fluid and marking it on your chart

+ get in the habit of doing this. Every. Single. Day.

+ educate yourself before taking the leap

+ if you have a partner, get them on board

+ find a supportive group, even if that’s online (#femmehead)

+ and finally get excited to have a menstrual cycle again, and a real period

So, while you can’t technically chart your cycle because you won’t have those changes in fertility signs, you can darn well start practicing and get comfy in your new lifestyle change.  And if you're even more curious about this transition — keep your eye open for my new course, all about coming off  hormonal birth control, which I'm looking to debut in early 2017.   

Why Body Literacy Is So Damn Important!

If you don’t take the initiative to learn what the heck is actually going on in your body, you’ll be left at the mercy of other’s information.

And while you’d hope, and assume, that everyone has your best interest in mind, I hate to break it to you — they don’t.

This isn’t me saying that we’re all horrible, no good, rotten jerks. No. We’re mostly good.

But there are plenty of people who are out for themselves [sometimes subconsciously] and in the medical world that usually means what brings in the most money.

And surprise, surprise, knowing what’s going on in your body isn’t a big money maker for them.

Charting your own cycle requires you to buy a thermometer — for just a couple of bucks — and that’s is. Didn’t hear me? Let me repeat that again. You need a thermometer and a piece of paper.

Now, if you’re in thermometer sales, more women charting is “Woo-Hoo!” awesome for you.

But, if you’re in the business of hormonal birth control it’s bad news bears.

More and more women are catching on though. They’re realizing, “Hey! This here, this is MY body, and I want to understand it better.”

Through the rise of popularity of things such as yoga, these ladies are getting more in touch with their inner selves and with their bodies.

When you start learning about your body, and what is actually going on [and I’m not talking about that half-ass crap you learned in 6th grade health class] magical things happen. Beautiful things happen.

There are so many “A-ha!” moments when it all starts to click and make sense. You start noticing things, consistencies, and when you have the information to why things happen, a certain sort of harmony with your body emerges.

No more fighting it and silently yelling to yourself “Why are you doing this to me???” Instead you go, “Oh hey, I feel you there and I understand your purpose. Thank you!”

Sounds silly, but I swear it’s the truth!