Say 'Yes' More Often

Ok, this is a super corny sounding blog post, but it’s worth sharing. 

So, I ready Shonda Rhimes book “The Year of Yes” and it was actually quite fabulous. And it got me thinking, you know what, there are so many situations where I say no to things. And I kind of unknowingly decided to start saying yes. 

It wasn’t like other things I’ve challenged myself to do, like take a break from caffeine or drink more water. I didn’t set a goal, it was just a mental shift that happened. 

You see, I’m kind of a pretty shy person. I know my comfort zone and I like to stay safely within it, if not barely walk around the perimeter to see what’s out there. 

And while there were bigger things I said no to because they scared me, there were small things I said no to on a daily basis, and I just ended up staying home instead. 

Now, I’ve just started recognizing all the moments in which I would have probably said no before and decide to say yes. 

I really do believe the energy you put out into the world is what you get back. If you’re closed off, you’re going to ignore or pass on opportunities.

It’s just been a few months now of this new mindset, but things have started happening that makes me wonder if they’re a result of me being more “open”. 

Things that have happened since I started saying yes more:

+ did a podcast interview — I’ve done interviews before here and there but this one felt different. It just seemed to come together and happen quickly, and I don’t know how to explain it but I felt like I had more of an impact during it.

+ had several 1-on-1 coaching requests come through — I normally have these come through one here and one there, but I had three come through within a week or two. 

+ have had several sponsorship opportunities land in my inbox — I get offers for plenty of junk or completely unrelated products, but there were a ton of relevant offers that came through. 

+ few different speaking chances — It’s on my 2018 goals to speak in front of a crowd (no matter how small), and I’ve had two different people say “You should do this”. 

+ a free entry into a few races — I mean it helps that my friends/husband are in the race world, but I don’t always take advantage of that. 

+ I got to film two races — Granted one of them was Michaels race and I was more told that was my role, but then another friend asked me to film their race after that. 

+ getting out and experiencing more — this is more of a general result of saying more, but hey, you get out and do a lot more by having this mindset rather than saying no and staying at home. 

+ feel more confident — A lot of people, myself included, say no because we don’t think we’re good enough to do something. But I’m all about the mindset of “fake it till you make it” even though it’s sometimes hard to do it personally.

I’ve been quicker to say yes, or follow up on opportunities, and while it’s terrifying to get out of your comfy little box where you feel so safe, it’s also so much more exhilarating out here. 

27 Things I've Learned By 27

Tomorrow is my birthday, yay!

And if you can't guess from the title I'm turning 27. I always like to use my birthday as another moment to reflect on what I've learned to better align myself going forward. 

So, today I wanted to share 27 (random) things that I've learned at the age of 27. In no particular order here we go!

ONE | friends and family are important —  you don’t know how long you’ll have them.

TWO | but don’t be afraid to let toxic people go — life is only so long, don't waste it on people that don't add anything to your life.

THREE | staying social is important for your mental well being — this is especially true if you work from home.

FOUR | you’re not a fraud — and you’re not the only one that feels like that. Imposter syndrome is a real thing, but keep pushing past that.

FIVE | say yes more often —  I realized this past year that I said no to a lot, even just little things.

SIX | challenge yourself —  it’s ok to feel uncomfortable, and it's the only way to grow

SEVEN | invest a bit more money into your belongings — rather than buy cheap things that you have to constantly replace take the time to research and then spend a bit more.

EIGHT | let go of all your excess crap — minimalism has transformed my life way beyond what I 'own'

NINE | how you treat your body directly impacts how you feel — if you don't know what you should be doing here take the time to educate yourself about how to take care of yourself 

TEN | sleep is important —  sleep is a good thing so it's time to let go of the “I can sleep when I’m dead” mentality. 

ELEVEN | pay attention to your money —  ignoring it doesn't help anyone. You can't fix anything if you don't know what's going on. Educate yourself about personal finance, and keep a positive mindset surrounding money.

TWELVE | set goals — write them down, and keep an eye on them. There have been studies that show people who take the time to write down their goals are much more likely to reach them. 

THIRTEEN | journal to see how far you’ve come — this is just one of the many benefits.

FOURTEEN | not every career path has a perfect degree or manual of how to do it —  and your first job out of college isn't going to be the same job you do forever. 

FIFTEEN | confrontation is uncomfortable, but conversations are important — talking through things is a must, don't let things bottle up because that's not going to help anyone involved. 

SIXTEEN | drink more water — I've always struggled with this, hence my current 30-day challenge, but I've already improved so much.

SEVENTEEN | you’ll feel better fueled by plants — even if you're not a vegan or vegetarian don't forget to be making room for plenty of fresh fruits and veggies each day

EIGHTEEN | there’s too much plastic in the world —  do your part, get a few reusable bags, a reusable water bottle, there are so many simple switches that make such a big impact. 

NINETEEN | acknowledge people you pass in the street —  say hi, smile, nod, just be nice. 

TWENTY| your job does not define you — not everyone has to have a super cool job, and if you're not a fan of your current job, don't sweat it, make time to find things to do that you do love. 

TWENTY-ONE | insurance is important — It's expensive (here in the US), but it just takes one emergency or accident and you're either saved by having it or screwed because you don't. Unfortunately, none of us are invincible. 

TWENTY-TWO | knowledge is power —  educate yourself about things you don’t understand. Learn how to open your mind to other opinions and perspectives as well. 

TWENTY-THREE | make time for travel —  it’s not as expensive or complicated as you think. Don't wait around for "if" and "when".

TWENTY-FOUR | learn about how your body works —  especially if you’re having problems with something. 

TWENTY-FIVE | don't hesitate to ask for help — whether it's a friend who's a marketing whiz, if you need help lifting something heavy or if you need some emotional support. 

TWENTY-SIX | don’t spend a bunch of money on your wedding — It's an important event in your life, but at the end of the day it's just one day. 

TWENTY-SEVEN | take care of your feet — you'll thank yourself when you're old. This means shoes that support your feet. 

A random list for sure, but maybe I was able to share a nugget of wisdom with you. 

What I'm Doing For Better Sleep

I like to sleep.

I think sleep is important and in no way am I one of those people who think “sleep is for the weak” or “you can sleep when you’re dead”.

One of the books I worked through recently was “The Sleep Revolution” by Arianna Huffington. And while I didn’t finish it completely, I have learned so much about just how important sleep is. 

Basically, stop skimping on sleep people!

In no way do I think have insomnia or any real sleep problems, but like a lot of people I go through phases of sleeping really soundly, to getting up four times a night, and then other times when it takes me a few hours to fall asleep. 

For me, there’s nothing better than waking up in the morning and going “I didn’t wake up once!"

Like many other situations in my life, I decided to pick up a few books and start reading more about sleep in hopes of making my time in bed better. 

So, today I wanted to share some of the things I’m trying to implement in my life to achieve more sleep. 

One of the biggest things for me was realizing I needed to give myself more time to slow down before bed. Instead of going from whatever it was I was doing, jumping into bed and just expecting myself to fall asleep right away. 

One of the hardest (but most important/helpful) things for me has been implementing a no technology an hour before bed rule. I can’t tell you the number of times I would either scroll through social media or watch YouTube videos up until the point I wanted to fall asleep. It doesn’t work. 

This means no laptop, no phone (and if you have a TV, none of that either). I’ve also been trying to avoid my phone first thing in the morning too. We’re all guilty of picking up our phone first thing to avoid actually getting out of bed. I’m working to knock that habit too. 

Instead of technology that last hour I’ve really been enjoying reading before bed. I just picked up two new books from the library, and I’ve found that reading makes for a much smoother transition for me. 

I would say these things have had the biggest impact so far, and it’s been very noticeable. I’m sleeping so much better almost right away. 

There are plenty of ways to wind down before bed sans technology. I really enjoy hot baths, taking the time for my skincare, brushing, flossing and all that fun stuff. 

Every now and then Michael and I will close the blinds in our bedroom on a particularly bright night (we live in the city). This helps a lot in falling asleep but I wish they would automatically open with the sunrise because that’s the best way to wake up I’ve found. 

Now, two things I do during the day that I think have also helped with my sleep: limiting my caffeine and exercising. 

A long time ago I set myself a 'one cup before noon' rule when it came to coffee (my caffeine of choice). Not only does this help me sleep better but if I’m consuming too much caffeine I can feel much more anxious, which is never good. 

And I really do find that I just feel all around better when I’m getting outside and active more often. Exercise is a great way to blow off extra energy as well as stress. 

Now I know if you have actual issues with insomnia and sleep you’re going to scoff at this list. But I wanted to make this for the average person who’s not getting great sleep but not suffering either. 

The biggest thing I’ve learned is the importance of keeping technology far way from bedtime. 

What have you done that’s helped you sleep better?

Mild Melancholy at the End of My Cycle

I’ve gotten a similar sensation at the end of the past two cycles and I was trying to put my finger on it, to give it a name. 

And the best way to describe it is a mild melancholy, “a feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause.” 

I’ve really come to terms with my cycle, my period and have grown to appreciate each of the phases for what they have to offer. 

Instead of getting frustrated or upset about something that happens I’m more curious than anything. 

And I’m pretty sure I feel this way the last day or two of my cycle because all of the plummeting hormone levels as my body prepares for the start of a new cycle. 

I just feel myself slowing down, turning inwards and either wanting to be out in nature or curled up at home.

There’s no cause for feeling “low”, but it’s not necessarily a bad feeling. I just feel reflective and a bit day dreamy. 

I find it’s best to journal, you never know what’s going to bubble to the surface. Or to get out into nature, whether that’s for a walk, run, lounge in the hammock. Being outside is what I find helps best to soothe the sad aspect of it, and nourish the pensive side of this sensation. 

Because regardless of what it is that I’m feeling I figure it’s got to be happening for a reason. The worst thing you can do is ignore a feeling or an emotion. Even if it’s negative or unpleasant, something is making you feel that way. And I find that working through it, digging into whatever it is always is what’s best. 

No matter who you are or what you do in life you’re going to come up against subconscious resistance, “Stay where you know, stay where it’s comfortable and easy.” But the best stuff is just beyond your comfort zone. Isn’t that what they always say. 

I’m guilty of trying to numb myself to things that are uncomfortable: conversations, situations, you name it. But I’ve been working to force myself to recognize these things, to acknowledge them and then ask myself where it's coming from. 

Because when I dig into it I discover new things about myself. Or I’m able to push myself outside my comfort zone where really cool things happen. 

So while some might see this sensation of melancholy as a negative aspect of getting your period, I see it as a positive. I see it as just another way my cycle connects me to things and challenges me to keep reaching for more. 

Have you noticed any interesting nuances of your own cycle that have made you stop and think? 

Anxiety + What I Do For It

A few weeks ago I shared in my Monday email that my anxiety had been kicking up lately, especially that past weekend. And I just wanted to say, I never write anything expecting a response or searching for one either, but all of the sweet messages I got were so nice, so thank you. 

I wanted to come on here and talk about some of the things I do when I find myself in a bout of anxiety. 

[But first I just want to start by saying, everyone's anxiety it different, and what works for me might not work for you. And I know my anxiety is pretty mild in comparison to what others are dealing with. This isn't a competition. I'm just doing my part in normalizing conversations about it.] 

My anxiety has been so much better lately then it was back in 2012/2013. And I attribute that improvement to some lifestyle changes:

+ getting out a relationship 

+ quitting hormonal birth control

+ going vegan 

+ getting into yoga/meditation/journaling

+ starting FemmeHead

I’m not an expert, nor probably very well informed when it comes to anxiety, but I think a lot of mine revolved around performance, not being good enough, or the fear of failing at life. And I still get bouts of this to this day. 

This wave of “what the hell are you doing?” will wash over me and I’ll find myself questioning all of my decisions and having this sense of "I’m going to fail, and it’s going to happen soon."

[Now, I really don’t want to offend anyone by any of my recommendations, because I know anxiety varies so much, and in no way am I saying you’re not trying hard enough. Everyone has to learn to handle their anxiety in the way that works for them. This is just what has worked for me.]

So, in no particular order: 

+ Journal — I find it helps so much to just get everything I’m thinking out of my head an onto paper. Not only does it help to clear my mind but it helps me work through things.  

+ Clean up my space — For me a cluttered space = a jumbled mind, and I find that not only is cleaning soothing for me but having a clean space helps so much with my mental well-being. Having a clear space gives me a sense of having my shit together. 

+ Meditate — I started meditating regularly during a particularly bad bout of anxiety surrounding working at the bar/restaurant. My mind races when the anxiety gets bad, running through all sorts of scenarios and such. I find that getting into the practice of being able to slow down and even clear my mind with meditation is so beneficial. 

+ Cut back on caffeine — I try to keep my daily intake to one cup before noon, but I find that one of the worst things I can do for myself when I’m feeling anxious is to drink more than one cup. (It’s a calming ritual to have something warm to sip on, but when the caffeine kicks in it’s not so calm). I try to switch to caffeine free tea. 

+ Pamper myself — This sounds trivial, but I find that if I set aside some time to take a nice hot bath, put on a face mask, do my nails or something to take care of myself really does help. 

+ Go for a run — Your exercise of choice might be something else but just being able to get out and blow off some steam, push yourself all feels great. Plus being outside in nature is good for my anxiety too. 

+ Write out a brainstorm list — This is something I did this last time. I sat down in my bed with my notebook and just wrote out everything I could think of that would help get ahead in life. Because this last time my anxiety was coming from fear of career failure and money I focused on everything I could do to take that next step forward. And I have to say this was one of the best things I did for myself. 

+ Meet up with a friend — I’ve been doing a great job this past year or two of getting together regularly with friends and family, but sometimes being social with someone you really enjoy being around is nice. Bonus if it’s a friend you can talk through things with. My friend I had coffee with a few weeks ago was so lovely and empathetic, and it’s nice to talk to someone you know gets what you’re going through. 

+ Talk through my “escape plan” — I don’t know about you but when I’m going through anxiety or depression I always have this escape route in mind. "If all else fails I can do this." Whether that’s 'go get a regular job' or 'buy a van to live in,' I like to let myself mentally play out that scenario and really go through whether that’s something I would want. And often it’s not. I mean I would love to build out a sprinter van one day to have for travel, but I really love my life and so that’s what I want to work on maintaining. 

+ Take action — Finally, it’s probably one of the hardest things to do when you have anxiety, but getting over that hump of fear and cracking down on something is what I find helps get me out of that slump. Sometimes my anxiety will crop up when I’m getting too stagnant in life, and it’s almost telling me to take that next step no matter how much it scares me. And I’ve found that once I started taking action things started falling into place. And I feel so much more jazzed about life and work now than before my anxiety showed up. 

Once again, my anxiety is probably much different than others, and there’s no doubt that others are suffering way more than I am. I’m thankful for my mild anxiety, and even though it sucks when it’s happening I’m so grateful it is where it is at now compared to five years ago.

Welcoming in Spring

Spring is one of my favorite seasons. I love the return of warm weather, trees budding, flowers blooming. 

When it’s mid-February and you’re bundled all the way up to your eyeballs, bracing yourself against the biting wind as you walk to and fro outside, you fantasize about spring. 

I always hopefully expect a clean transition from winter to spring, from cold to warm. But I always laugh at my naivety when spring first starts and mother nature doesn’t seem to quite have it all figured out yet. 

I know it’s different depending on where you live, but it’s kind of a local joke here in Iowa. You’ll have a 60-degree day where everyone comes outside to soak in the warmth, and then there will be a blizzard two days later. 

I suppose this just makes you that much more grateful for the warm days when they are here. 

Just this morning as I was walking to the coffee shop to work I realized it felt like a spring morning. It had that mild crispness with the promise of warmer temperatures later in the day.

We all have different ways in which we welcome in each season as it arrives, but I’ve realized I have a few different things I’ve been doing during this transition. 

An obvious one if you’ve been following along with FemmeHead is that I switch up my wardrobe with each season. So, I’ve got a capsule that a combination of all the things I’ll need for the undecided weather. It’s always so exciting to put short-sleeve shirts, dresses, and shorts in your capsule, knowing you’ll get to wear them soon. 

The next thing is something that a lot of people do, and have been doing long before I was born, deep cleaning and decluttering the house. There’s nothing better than throwing open all the windows on a Sunday, putting on some music and cleaning out your whole house. I love being able to get to things that I have put off for a few months, and the final product of a squeaky clean, decluttered house is all worth it.  

I am a hermit in the winter. It takes a lot to get me to bundle up to go outside. So, staying active is a real problem for me when it’s cold. But there’s something about those few warm days at the end of winter that gets me so jazzed up about getting outside and doing something active. This spring its training for a half-marathon with my mom, but even just going out for walks, hikes, bike rides, you name it, I love it. 

Overall, spring is just a time of change for me. It’s a fresh start in many senses. It’s a great time to reboot habits you’ve let slip like waking up early, eating fresh fruits and veggies, and doing a mental assessment of things you want to change. 

Just yesterday I made a list of books I want to pick up because I have that itch for some self-improvement. It’s so easy to be static and consistent in the winter, which isn’t a bad thing, but when spring rolls around I’m ready to spice things up, to try something new. 

What are the ways you change when spring rolls around? I always just get this burst of energy, motivation, and inspiration to get cracking on being the best me possible. 

Your Period Is Not Evil

I’m just continually trying to do my part in breaking the taboo surrounding our periods and menstrual cycle. And today I want to talk about how our periods aren’t evil. 

Because I see all too often so much negativity surrounding our periods. 

When we’re younger, and first get our periods, there’s this sense of “this is unfair, boys don’t have to do this!”

When we get older they’re seen as an annoying inconvenience mixed with gratitude that they came. 

Then when women start trying to conceive their periods transform into something that is downright evil. 

Our poor periods can’t ever win with us. 

Our periods aren’t this thing separate from us, happening to us. They’re just a part of our reproductive system, just like breathing is a part of our respiratory system and our heart beating is part of our cardiovascular system. 

But at the same time if there’s something painfully wrong with your period, don’t feel like you just have to deal with it. It takes women so long to get diagnosed with hormonal issues like PCOS or Endometriosis. And most of the time doctors will try and put you on hormonal birth control to “balance your hormones”. Don’t even get me started with this BS “band-aid”, one size fits all solution. 

This idea that our periods and our fertility are all things that need to be controlled by some outside source is ridiculous. 

I’m guilty of these beliefs just like anyone else. 

I fell into the trap as a teenager thinking my period was this out of body thing that I needed to contain. I went on hormonal birth control to “make my periods easier”, but the pill didn’t improve them that much, and not enough to make up for all the negative side effects that being on the pill came with. 

By trying to control something, my period and later my fertility, I ended up doing more harm than good to my body, and mind. 

Don’t get me wrong I am forever grateful for the easy access I had to hormonal birth control at that age. But I’m also really bitter about everything I didn’t know at that age too. 

These days I hear about teenagers who use period tracking apps to actually know where they are in their cycle, something so simple now was always a guessing game for me growing up. I never knew you could track, let alone chart your cycle. 

I just wish I could share the knowledge I now have surrounding cycles and charting with every girl headed into getting her first period, every teenager and young adult annoyed with her period, trying to control her fertility, and every woman trying to get pregnant. 

That’s part of the reason the first course I created was Chart Your Cycle for everyone who is new to FAM and charting. It’s a place to learn the sympto-thermal method in an understandable and relatable way. Zero judgment, embarrassment, and very little confusion. And the confusion is where I come in to answer questions. 

Knowledge is power and learning about my cycle, my fertility and my body were one of the most incredible things I have done for myself. I wasn’t always this period or body positive. I used to groan when my period showed up, expected the guy I was dating to know what to “do” instead of telling him what I liked, and I mentally picked my body apart wishing I looked different than I did. 

You wouldn’t think there were so many positive effects from one small change, but it was a huge change in my little world, splitting it wide open, changing my direction in life and so much more. 

I truly believe I wouldn’t be who I am today without getting off the pill and learning about my body. It all stems from small shifts in our attitude and perception, and can start with something as simple as realizing that our periods are a part of us, not some evil witch out to ruin our lives. 

Writing "Letters to the Universe"

I mentioned that I had written a Letter to the Universe in a recent weekly email. I thought I had talked about doing this before on FemmeHead, but I’m not sure I have. So, of course, I had to take a moment today to share the power of doing this. 

I’ve never been a very religious person. I tried really hard growing up, I went to bible study, youth group, and church with friends and family. I worked to memorize where in the Bible the different chapters were because it was always so embarrassing to feel like I was the only one that couldn’t just flip to a chapter as it was called out. 

I also grew up in small-town Iowa where everyone was religious. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it never resonated with me no matter how hard I tried. Eventually, I stopped trying to squeeze myself into that mold that I just didn’t fit in, and I feel like I’ve been able to connect to a level of spirituality that I never found with Christianity. 

[This is not going to be me talking smack about Christianity, I promise. I just have to share how it wasn’t for me, and I think people shouldn’t force themselves into something that doesn’t work for them because there are plenty of options for discovering spirituality out there in the world. There is no right or wrong option as long as you’re not harming anyone or discriminating against anyone.]

I’ve never been able to wrap my mind around the idea that there is one entity in control. Instead for me, it’s more like there’s this energy that connects everything. And everyone has a different name for what this is to them. For me, I like to picture this “energy" as Mother Nature or the Universe. 

Ok, that’s enough of me trying to explain all that. But it’s important for explaining why I love writing Letters to the Universe so much. 

I first discovered LTTU from the lovely Vienda Maria. She was talking about them as a tool of manifesting in a course of hers. I wrote one for the first time back in 2015, and it’s been something I’ve been doing ever since. 

So, what the heck is a Letter to the Universe” you might be wondering? 

For me it’s like writing in my journal, but bigger. Because I’m not just documenting, or musing about something. I’m consciously putting a desire or wish into words and then releasing it to the universe. I’m asking for help with something I want to happen, or guidance on an issue I don’t have an answer to. 

I start it like any letter you’d write, “Dear so and so” only the “person” I’m writing to is the Universe. 

My most recent one started with “Hello Beautiful Universe” and went from there. I also like to date my letters for when I stumble across them again. I love to see what I asked for and to think about how that came to me, or didn't. 

I always start my letters with something I’m grateful for. I say thank you for x y and z. From there I get into what I’m there to ask for. I like to get detailed in these letters. What is it exactly I want, why do I want that and how is that going to make me feel? 

After I feel like I’ve adequately explained my request I’ll finish off the letter with even more gratitude and thanks. 

Sign that letter with love, and then let it go. 

I keep all of my letters in my Evernote because that’s where I keep everything I write (except for my journal of course). So they’re there if I want to look at them, but I rarely do. 

You want to imagine it as taking what you want and releasing it to the Universe with the expectation that whatever you’ve asked for is going to happen. Because it always does in one way or another. 

It’s all part of manifesting, the law of attraction, prayer, whatever you want to call it. 

The great thing about writing these letters is that it forces you to get detailed about what it is exactly that you want. How often do we “want” something but when we sit down and think about it we don’t have a clear idea of what exactly that is, or how it would work out.

If we don’t know what we’re looking for we’ll never find it. 

And once you put in the time of actually writing down what it is and how it would make you feel to have it, things start to happen. Opportunities come, you start making decisions to get yourself there, and the magic starts happening. It’s a way to open yourself up to different possibilities, a way to stay conscious so when something does come along you’re able to stop and say “Hey, this might be my answer from the Universe”. 

In the end, there’s no right or wrong way to do this. People do it all the time in so many different ways. Writing letters is just one way I like to put my desires and intentions out there in the world. 

Do you do anything similar to this? What does that look like for you, and what are some of the cool things that have come from it? 

Stress + Your Cycle

Stress is a real pain in the ass. It has plenty of negative effects and is all around not good. 

Effects on your body:

+ headaches

+ muscle tension/pain

+ chest pain

+ fatigue

+ change in libido

+ upset stomach

+ sleep issues

Effects on your mood:

+ anxiety

+ restlessness

+ lack of motivation/focus

+ feeling overwhelmed

+ irritable

+ sadness/depression

Effects on your behavior:

+ eating too much/not enough

+ outbursts

+ drug/alcohol use

+ social withdrawal

+ exercising less

But how can it mess with your menstrual cycle? 

I can see from that list a whole host of ways it can interfere. 

If you’re in a rut of chronic stress or have recently experienced a very stressful event (think the loss of a job or loved one), your hormones can be suppressed, which can cause your period to be delayed or stop altogether. 

When you’re stressed your body secretes the hormones adrenaline and cortisol, which can suppress estrogen and progesterone production, which we know are necessary for a healthy cycle. 

Your body reacts to stress and being in a state of “fight or flight” by sending signals to your body saying "now is not a good time to get pregnant." 

I’ve seen it before in my own cycle. In a time of stress, my body will delay ovulation until things have calmed down a bit. 

And if you’re trying to conceive, stress could be playing a role in your difficulty getting pregnant. Because if your body is sending around the “not a good time to get pregnant” signal that’s no bueno.

Your PMS symptoms can also be exacerbated by stress. Think acne, irritability, fatigue and so on. Yay.

Being stressed is not another thing to stress about, there are easy things you can do to help de-stress. 

The three main things I found that help reduce stress are diet, exercise and sleep. 

If things aren’t going great we can find ourselves reaching for comfort foods that might not be nourishing our bodies how they need to be. Plan out your meals before you go shopping. What are some nutritious recipes that get you excited about cooking and eating them? Some people find meal prepping before the start of the week makes eating healthier easier. And if you have a busy life being able to grab your lunch quickly from the fridge on your way out the door is going to help a lot. 

Exercise can be the last thing on our minds when we’re stressed. “I don’t have time for that!” But there are plenty of easy ways to fit a little movement into our days. Take the stairs instead of the elevator or escalator, go for walks even if it’s just 10 minutes. Some people find attending a workout class works better than having to come up with a workout routine on their own. 

And along that same line can we talk about yoga for a second? Not only is it exercise but it does so much more for the mind as well. Plus you can pop on a video from YouTube and do a quick 15-minute routine in your living room. I also like doing a few yoga stretches before bed or even in bed. Just this morning I did about five minutes of stretching to prolong the whole getting out of bed thing. 

And when you find yourself restless at night, unable to sleep but exhausted, it might be worth looking into a natural sleep aid to help get you back on track with sleeping. You can try melatonin or something like Bach Rescue Sleep Liquid Melts (not sponsored, Michael loves them). 

A few other things that can help you de-stress and sleep better: meditation and journaling before bed (as well as those yoga stretches). I can’t begin to talk about how beneficial meditation and journaling has been for me. I can tell a huge difference between when I’m consistently doing both and when I’m not. 

Neither of them have to be fancy. Find a meditation app like Headspace or currently I’ve been enjoying meditating to the music on the Calm app. And just grab an old notebook and write down what you’re feeling, what happened that day and anything that comes to mind. Get it out of your head  and onto paper, and I promise you’ll feel so much better after. 

Some people like to work through things on their own (hello that’s me), but consider opening up to a friend because you’d be surprised how many people are stressed or anxious and it can help to have someone to just talk to about it. 

In the end listen to your body. Pay attention to how you’re feeling, when you need to take a break, step back and breathe. And it’s so important to make self-care a focus. Give yourself ten minutes a day of “me” time and maybe a  bit more time on the weekend to focus on yourself. 

Stress is a pain and you can definitely stress more about being stressed, which can spiral out of control. Just being conscious of it, and willing to take the time work through it goes a long way. 

What are some of your ways you deal with stress? Beyond the things I talked about today I also enjoy running, being out in nature, bubble baths, deep cleaning my apartment and having at home spa dates with myself. 

An Intuitive Menstrual Phase This Cycle

I’ve seen a number of people talking about intuitive eating, where you listen to your body and eat what you feel like, not forcing meals if you’re not hungry and just eating what you want. 

I’ll always be learning and evolving in this area of life, but I have made great progress over the past few years to just listening to my body. 

Who would have ever thought it would have been so difficult to just give your body what it needs? 

I’ve talked before about some different strengths and weaknesses we have in each phase of our cycle. And that’s the obvious first step, just recognizing the different phases and acknowledging that you have different needs in each. 

I feel like I’ve done a good job this past menstrual phase (period) of really slowing down, and going about my days differently. 

Normally, I love getting up early and getting going on my day of work pretty soon after. 

But last Monday was the start of a new cycle, and for whatever reason, it hit me fairly hard. 

I was exhausted, but not sleeping well, which just snowballs as you know. I was feeling zero motivation for work and frustrated for that lack of spark. 

I wanted to stay home and be alone but knew I would feel more inspiration if I went out and worked somewhere public. 

So, instead of pushing myself to conform to my normal schedule I decided to create a new one for that week. 

I let myself sleep in. I took my mornings slowly, making sure I was eating a breakfast, even if it was something small. 

The weather was nice so I made sure I was spending time outside, walking to the coffeeshop or library to work, going on walks in the afternoon, getting a bit of physical movement each day. Even if this meant cutting my work day short I knew that getting outside when it was warm, and moving was going to do for me mentally and physically then forcing myself to stay inside and work. 

Each morning after I made my way to where I was going to work for a bit, I wrote out a to-do list, and focused on the things I had to actually get done for the day. Then if I got those tasks completed, and didn’t feel like working for the rest of the day I didn’t. 

There was one day that I was feeling very reflective, thoughtful and curious. And I used that to focus on some research I needed to do instead of pushing myself to do other projects I wasn’t drawn to. This was a way for me to still be productive, but also to listen to what I needed that day. 

I always find that my menstrual phase is a great time to reflect on how things went last month, what goals I want to focus on coming up. And it’s always a great idea to come up with ideas for content, projects or things I want to do. 

I know I’m very lucky in that I have control over my work days, but there are ways you can support your needs regardless of your lifestyle. 

One thing that always helps me is to cut back on how social I am during my period. Instead, I choose to focus on myself, have a little pamper "me" time, and plan meet-ups for the following week when I’ll be wanting to connect with others. 

Sleep is always a big thing for me. And while we can’t all sleep in, we can usually tweak our bedtime a little. Whether this is to squeeze in 30 more minutes or sleep or an hour more. I promise this always has such a positive effect for me. And make sure the quality of sleep you’re getting is adequate. If you’re tossing and turning it doesn’t matter how much time you spend in bed. You’re not going to be well rested. 

For me this meant taking a homeopathic sleep aid a few nights, and giving myself to wind down with a little meditative music to fall asleep to. I’m very guilty of technology right up until bed time. But I always notice it’s negative effect more during my period. Give yourself an hour or so before bed to disconnect. Maybe this can be when you get ready for bed, take a bath, read a book, meditate, whatever fits into your schedule. 

And whenever I focus on taking care of myself during those few days of my period I ways find that I come out of it with so much energy, motivation and spunk for life and work. So, while I feel that frustration during my period of “why can’t I just focus and be productive?!” I always remind myself to give myself those few days and all of that will return soon enough. 

This month that meant that the first of my period was pretty rough and I didn’t get much done, the second day was a bit better, but by the third day I was back at it and super productive. I just have to back off for a few days and the results are so worth it for me.

What are ways in which you listen to your body? How do you nurture yourself? What are some of the things you’ve noticed since you’ve taken more of an intuitive approach? 

Sorry Winter, I'm Ready For Spring

I can’t actually complain about winter. I’ve gotten a pretty big break with our trips so far this year. Those warm trips always make coming back to a cold Iowa a little more bearable. 

But what gets me itching for winter to be over more than anything is when we have a really nice day here. When it’s the end of February and nearly 70 degrees out. That’s when I find myself saying “This is what my soul needs!” 

You don’t realize how much the weather truly impacts you until you go from having to bundle up just so your skin doesn’t hurt, to being able to go for a walk in just a sweatshirt a week later. 

Blue skies, sunshine and warmth, that’s what I crave. 

Monday this week I felt pretty meh from the lack of sleep I had, and the start of my period complete with cramping. I posted on Instagram about this wave of melancholy I was feeling that day. 

The next day I woke up, fully rested, to blue skies and sunshine. Then to top it all off I found out that it was already above 50, headed towards 60 degrees that day. Sweet baby Jesus get me outside!

And it was amazing, the huge difference I felt between those two days. Granted the start of my period probably had quite a bit to do with Monday (it was nice out too). But I had such a pep in my step walking around during that 66-degree day. 

I felt energized, inspired and just really freaking happy. 

I will buy winter boots for next winter, I promise, but I just crave that sensation where you close your eyes and tilt your head towards the warmth of the sun.  And I swear I can feel it recharging my mental and physical batteries as I do it.  

I want to be able to throw open my windows, let in the fresh air and dance around my kitchen while making food. I want to go for walks, runs, bike rides and you know what, I really want to ride my longboard around again.

I want to set up my hammock in the park to read or journal. I want to walk outside in sandals and shorts and feel hot. I want to sweat.

I want to go outside during a warm summer rainstorm. I want to crack my windows open that night to fall asleep to that glorious sound of the rain outside.

I want to go down to visit my sister and go out on walks with her and my little nephew. (I’ve been getting snaps of her and him doing this since it’s been warm this week.) I want to sit out on her back porch with them. (She has a very peaceful house). I want to go down to my parent's house out in the woods and just sit in that silence of being out in nature away from the city.

Gah, there’s so much I want to do when it gets warm, and I really hope I remember this feeling, this desire for spring when spring finally comes. 

What’s your favorite season? What’s the one you find yourself looking forward to most? If you can’t tell mine is spring, but then again I’m a spring baby so maybe I’m biased. 

Books I've Read This Year | January + February

One of my best friend’s and I started our little two-person book club, and I’ve toyed with the idea of starting an online book club (plus a lot of you have asked for it). But since I haven’t gotten around to actually doing that, nor do I know if I want to, I have just tried to share the books I’ve been reading that I enjoy on here.

I always look to other’s “What I’ve Been Reading” as inspiration for what to pick up next. And I always find some fantastic books. So, today I wanted to share what I’ve read so far in 2018. 

I always love picking up a book or two to read when I travel, and I was torn between getting two or three books with me to Sri Lanka. I ended up choosing two, but I wish I would have brought three. 

There was a lot of laying outside in the warmth reading. It was delicious and such a nice treat after being burrowed up in Iowa. 

So, the two books I brought with me were both about WWII (I didn't do that on purpose), and I can’t recommend the both of them enough. 

The first one I read was, We Were the Lucky Ones, which is about a Polish family torn apart during the war, fighting to survive, wondering what the fate of their family was and working to reunite after the war.

We’ve all learned about WWII in school, the holocaust, concentration camps and the awful things that happened. But I learned so much in reading this book about the horrors outside the concentration camps. How everything changed before, how people didn’t believe it was going to get that bad. How friends who had grown up together turned their backs on their Jewish friends.

It’s one of those books that pulls you apart and then puts you back together again. 

It took me only a few days to tear through the first book, but after I finished that I reached for the second book I brought along, Under a Scarlet Sky. 

This one was about a teenage boy in Italy during WWII. He was a privileged kid who ended up being involved in the war in a few ways that didn’t involve going to battle. 

Before reading this I never really knew much about Italy during the war, and I felt like I learned quite a bit. It also makes me think of myself at that age, how much I’ve matured since then, and what would have happened if I were put in that position. 

He became a driver for one of Hitler’s Generals in an effort by his family to keep him off the front lines when he turned 18, which was basically a death sentence at the time.  

Who knows why I was drawn towards two books about WWII, but I’m very glad I went with both of them. I learned so much and got different perspectives I hadn’t heard known about before. 

I started reading the free excerpt from this next book while I was still in Sri Lanka. I’m not sure why but something about buying a digital copy of a book vs a physical book doesn’t feel the same for me. I like physical copies of things. 

Anyways, I started reading the first 65 pages of The Girl With All the Gifts during our last week in Sri Lanka, and when I got home I checked it out from the library. It was like not getting to finish a movie on the plane ride, you have to find a way to finish it just to know what happens. 

This was actually a pretty quick, easy read. I could pick it up and read a few chapters before bed without really having to use that much brain power. And I was finished in just a few days. 

I’m normally not one for zombie plots, but this one was different. I won’t say much more about it because I would start giving stuff away. I don't know how people normally become zombies in other plots but this one was through a type of fungus. This story combines trying to survive with working to find a "cure". 

And I wasn’t expecting the ending, but I also wish they would have gone a bit further with the ending. It just felt a bit abrupt, and I wanted more explanation. 

All in all, it wasn’t the most thought-provoking read, but it really wasn’t bad either. (Like I said I'm not normally a zombie story person). Sometimes it’s nice to just have an easy, entertaining read in between more difficult ones. 

We Were the Lucky Ones was probably my favorite, but was followed closely by Under a Scarlet Sky. If you're looking for a good book to read I recommend both of those. 

Any favorite reads from this year so far? 

What I've Been Eating This Winter

I was scrolling through my Instagram the other day and I came across some of the refreshing smoothies, salads, and plates of fruit I had enjoyed in the warmer months. And while I dearly miss things like avocado and watermelon I'm still making it through the colder months just fine. 

And it got me thinking how my diet changes with the different seasons. So, today I wanted to share some of my current staple meals, regardless of how boring they might be, they are what's getting me full through the winter. 

Every now and then I like to share what I'm eating to show that you can be plant-based without having beautifully arranged acai bowls and that it doesn't have to be expensive or difficult

Oatmeal  — an easy, inexpensive breakfast that can be made without much thought. You can keep it simple with just some brown sugar, molasses or maple syrup, or you can doll it up with fruits, nuts, seeds, and countless other toppings. 

Potatoes — easy to pop two in the microwave or oven. You can pour some soup (chili or lentil) over the top of them, or you can top them with beans, hot peppers, pickled beets, sauerkraut and pickled cabbage. Potatoes is one of the things I always try to buy organic because they're on the dirty dozen list. 

Chickpea Sandwiches/toast — so easy, so filling and so customizable. I can just simple mash up some chickpeas with a few spices and sriracha or stack them to the nines with all the fixings like saurkraut, pickled beets and seeds. 

Soups — warmth is key in the winter. And whether it’s making a stew or chili from scratch, or picking up a couple cans of soup to have on hand for a quick meal, soup is an easy option. You can also add different toppings to them, eat them with potatoes or chips. And if you make a big batch from scratch it can last for quite a number of meals. Not to mention you can often make an amazing soup from leftover ingredients and vegetables in your fridge. 

Nachos — odd, I know but easy, filling and you can throw whatever you have on top of a pile of chips and it works as nachos. 

Pierogi — a little time consuming so I don’t make them more than like once a month, but they are so satisfying. I always put potato and onion in mine and then eat them with a little vegan sour cream, sriracha, and pickled beets. Drool.

Salads — a lot of my meals have been “heavy” and I guess that’s just something I crave in the winter. But I also have to balance it out with something lighter like a nice big salad. Sometimes I just want something fresh, and that’s when I go for a big salad. And there are literally so many options when it comes to salads. 

Fruit — the ultimate compliment to breakfast or any other meal to be honest. I always try to add in some fruit whether it's a snack or a side dish for the same reason I reach for salads because I’m craving something light and fresh. 

As you can see none of these are time-consuming or fancy (Pierogi maybe but they're just flour, onion and potato so therefore easy). I do try to spice things up by trying a new recipe every few weeks, but keeping things simple cut down on the time used up planning and cooking.

What are some of your staple dishes for the winter months? 

Trying to Mend My Night Routine

I’ve got the perfect morning routine almost down pat, but my nighttime routine still has some work to do. 

There are elements of my nights that I love, but there are also things that I know need to be added or nixed. 

So, let’s start with what I’ve got going for me: 

+ skincare — when I was younger and first started having to take care of my skin I was awful at it. In college, there were countless nights when I would go to bed without washing my face, even when I had a full face of makeup on. I cringe thinking about it now. But now I’ve gotten to the point of adulthood where I wash my face before going to be. And there’s nothing better than a freshly washed and moisturized face. 

+ sleepy time tea — I took a break from caffeine and instead drank a lot of herbal tea. One of my favorites was sleepy time tea and while I don’t have it every night it is nice to have a mug of something hot to sip on when you get into bed. 

+ about twice a week I read before bed — in my ideal world I would read every night before bed, but I’m not there yet. But I always love the times that I do. 

+ gratitude — sounds cheesy but Michael and I share what we’re grateful for that day, and it sends you to bed feeling really warm and fuzzy inside. 

Things that I like but probably aren’t the best for winding down:

+ Michael and I love watching an episode (or a few) on Netflix at the end of the day. Right now we’re on the last season on The Office as well as the new season of The Crown. I know it’s not good to stare at a laptop before going to bed, but it’s this fun little thing we both enjoy to wind down from the day 

What I need to stop:

+ staying off social media — I’ve gotten a lot better over the years but I used to have to scroll through Instagram until I got through all the new posts. Ridiculous I know. But overall I’d like to cut down on technology before bed. 

What I would like to add:

+ mediation — I go through phases of meditating regularly, but I would love to start consistently doing it at night. And not leave it to the last thing or I will definitely fall asleep during.

+ journaling — while I’m all about morning pages, I would love to add regular journaling at night as a way to reflect on and document my day. I love looking back on old journals, and I think night time would be a great spot to start doing it consistently. 

+ pajamas — ok, last and probably weirdest, but in the past year or two I’ve really wanted to get a dedicated pair of pj’s that I only wear to bed instead of stuff I also work out in. Something about getting into the mindset of sleep is what keeps pulling me towards getting a pair of pajamas.

What are your favorite parts of your night time routine, and what would you change? 

Creating a Morning Routine to Cut Down on Decision Fatigue

Limiting your decisions can help you avoid decision fatigue. While you’re usually aware of when you’re physically exhausted, many of us can’t tell when we’re worn out from making decision after decision all day long. 

Seriously, think of everything you have to decide on throughout a typical day. What to wear, what to eat, how to style your hair, what shoes go with what you’re wearing, how much you should layer up before heading outside, what to pack for lunch. And these are just a few of the things you need to figure out before work when an endless stream of decisions have to be made, all day long. 

Sounds exhausting doesn’t it. 

Well, turns out, limiting the number of decisions you make each day is beneficial overall. 

So, today I wanted to touch on why I have a morning routine that’s pretty much the same thing each day. It’s what works for me, gets me ready for the day and helps save my brain power for the more important things that need to be decided on later in the day. 

For the most part, I get up at the same time every day. I let myself sleep in a little more on my period, but having my alarm set at 6 a.m. every day allows me to start my day with the important task of taking my basal body temperature.

After that, I usually go to the bathroom and then go back to make my bed. I used to never make my bed when I was younger, but now it’s one of the first steps in my morning tidying routine that mentally sets me up for the day.

Then I head out into the kitchen to finish cleaning up from the day before. I also get the kettle going for tea and oatmeal. While that’s going I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth and do my skincare. 

From there I head into the back bedroom where my closet and desk are. I pick out what I’m going to wear. Lately, it's one of two pairs of jeans, and one of three sweaters. 

Thanks to having a capsule wardrobe what I have to choose from is pretty small and makes getting dressed effortless. Never do I feel like I have “nothing to wear” anymore. Nor do I spend more than 30 seconds picking out what to wear. 

If you’re not into the whole “uniform” thing and have more to choose from, try picking out your outfit the night before so you can just throw it on in the morning and get going. 

When I lived with my parents after graduation and went to two jobs each day I would pack my lunch the night before. I would love to get into the habit of meal prepping but I haven’t made it to that point yet. But how nice would it be to just do it all one day and then each day you just had to pull a meal out of the fridge and go? 

From there I sit down at my desk with my planner and write down the four or five most important things I need to do that day. (This can also be done the night before, but I like doing it first thing). And from there I just start in on the first task without worrying too much about it. 

Everyone is different but simplifying my routine in the morning and just knowing what I’m going to do makes it much easier to get into the mindset of work, and then have the energy to be able to make big decisions while working instead of blowing that on menial tasks that don’t really matter. 

How do you cut down on the number of decisions you make in the morning? 

Inspiration for Gift Giving

I know Christmas is over and we’ve got a long time until it’s time to celebrate again, but I wanted to share some of my favorite presents that I gave and got this year for inspiration. Because there’s going to be plenty of times throughout this year that you want to get someone a gift. 

Presents I Gave

+ bath bombs — if they like baths, they’ll love bath bombs.

+ incense — nag champa incense is my favorite, and anyone that likes smelly goodness will love incense.

+ a journal — I kept a journal starting last Christmas and wrote an entry every day of what we did, and then gave it to Michael this year. It was a big hit. 

+ power bank — for that person whose phone battery is always almost dead. I got this Anker one for Michael. 

+ inflatable lounge — much more of a warm weather gift, but Michael is all about being comfy, and he likes to go out and sit in a hammock in the summer so I thought this would be good to have in the car for when he can’t find trees close enough.

+ string map — a lot of fun to make, and pretty simple too. Just need a board, nails, and some embroidery string. I made a map of Iowa for a friend, but you could make letters or silhouettes. So many options. 

+ packing cubes — for anyone who travels and appreciates organization. I like these. 

+ chocolate — you can’t go wrong here. 

+ gift card — let them choose their gift at their favorite store.

+ suspend game — I was looking for a white elephant gift that would be good for any age. And I found this one, which is kind of like Jenga. 

+ s’more kit — my dad is the s’more king and he likes anything chocolate. But you could do a hot chocolate kit or any number of food kits. 

+ hygge kits — or at least that’s what I called them. I gave one to two friends as well as my mom and sister. They had face masks, warm sock slippers, chocolate, a candle and incense. 

+ regifted things — you might think this is tacky, but I think it’s genius. If you have something cool that just isn’t your style or you don’t use it, give it to someone that will. 

Presents I Got

+ hanging planter — Yes, a friend made me an awesome hanging planter that’s hanging above my desk now. I love it. It looks kind of like this one. 

+ vegan “meats” — Our friend got Michael and I a selection of vegan meat from this shop we visited in Minneapolis.  

+ knitted socks, hat, cardigan — my mom is a knitting goddess and each year I get some amazing knitted goodies. So, if you can knit or crochet make something!

+ wine — you can’t go wrong with wine.

+ converted home movies — my younger brother sent in all our old home videos to this company that converted them into mp4’s that we now all have access to for the rest of time. One of my favorite gifts. 

What are some of your favorite gifts that you gave or received? 

My 2018 Goals

I know, I just bashed on New Years Resolutions last week, but it’s not setting goals that I have a problem with. It’s thinking that you can only do it for New Years and if you slip up once then you should just quit until next year. 

I first made “resolutions” two years ago. Last year I set separate goals for my personal and professional life, and this year I’m going to do the same.

So, without further ado, here are my 2018 goals!

PROFESSIONAL

+ create two new courses — I already know what I want them to be, and have started working on one, but the goal is to complete them and get them online for people to have.

+ create a workshop — I already have the concept of what I want it to be, it’s just a matter of putting my head down to finish creating it. And then (deep breathe) hold the workshop.

+ talk in front of an audience — Is anyone else shy? I’m really good behind a camera and a computer because I can think through and edit what I want to say. But when you’re in front of a crowd there’s no going back. 

+ expand my second channel — I started a second channel in 2017 (that was actually one of my goals), but this year I’m very excited to see it expand from just a vlog channel.

+ release new merch collection — You guys loved my FemmeHead shirts and totes, so I’m going to release more! I want to create a few new designs as well as offer more of the original design. 

+ 100,000 YouTube subscribers — Yup, the big One, Zero, Zero. I’m roughly around 37,000ish away from it. And I think I can do it! (But it’s never about the number of subscribers for me. It’s about who I’m actually able to help. It’s just been a fun little goal to set myself since I started on YouTube).

PERSONAL

+ learn to play a song on the uke — I bought a ukulele over a year ago, and while I’ve gone through phases of practicing I’ve never learned an entire song. 

+ participate in a race — I think this might become a yearly goal for me. I had the same goal last year and I ended up doing my first 5k, triathlon and marathon. Boom!

+ take myself on solo dates — There are places around town (the botanical garden comes to mind) where I’ve always wanted to go but haven’t because I didn’t have someone to go with. So now, I want to take myself on at least one solo date a month. 

+ keep all of my receipts — Yup, boring, but for accounting and tax purposes it would make it a lot easier if I had my paper receipts. (Thankfully a lot of my buying is done online). 

+ pay off my student loans — When I first graduated I made the goal of two years. And I was on track, but then I met a boy and had to rebalance my finances. Well, I’ve kept paying off more than what I owe and I’m down to just above $5,000. Can I pay that off this year? 

+ hang out with a family member and a friend once a week —spending time with those I love has taken more of a priority over this past year, and I’ve done such a great job I want to keep at it!

+ produce less waste/buy less plastic — When I first discovered the zero waste and minimalist lifestyles I did a great job of reducing the amount of waste I created. Well, so many freaking things come in plastic, and I want to make it a goal this year to cut down on plastic overall. 

What are some of your goals that you're most excited for this year? 

Don't Wait Until New Years to Change Your Habits

I am all for setting goals for the new year. But I think there are a lot of people that put so much weight into their “resolutions”, make them almost impossible to reach, and once they slip up, they think whelp I’ve failed, better go back to what I was doing before and wait until next year. 

I’m specifically thinking of people’s weight loss goals. There’s nothing wrong with setting this sort of resolution. But I think instead of saying I want to lose 20 pounds, you should make your goals other things that will get you there. Things like “This year I want to run a half marathon,” “This year I want to cut out processed foods 5 days a week,” “This year I want to pack my own lunches for work.” 

And going along with this, there is no reason you have to wait until January 1st to make the change. I am constantly setting resolutions for myself all year long. 

I’ve seen studies that say 8% of people keep their New Years Resolutions. Only 8%!

While I set my goals for the new year, I use those almost as intentions. I check in with them almost every month or two, but I set different goals for each month. 

I want people to approach goal setting, and New Years Resolutions differently. So many are setting themselves up for failure, and there’s no fun in that. 

It’s time to start approaching each month as a chance to make a change, each week and every day as a chance to make a positive change in our lives. 

The next part of the equation is the failure. It’s going to happen. It’s a real drag to try and be perfect. No one is. You’re going to fail and that’s just part of the process. But the trick is once you fail to think “Right, no big deal. My fresh start begins now.” 

There’s this place we go for Taco Tuesday, and a while ago the girl ringing us up started asking about being vegan (I asked for no cheese and she asked). She then went on to talk about how she tried to go vegan the previous summer, made it four days and then had some honey glazed almonds, and because she thought she had “failed” threw the whole goal out the window and went back to eating meat. 

You guys, we’ve got to cut ourselves some more slack than that! 

“Oh shoot, those had honey on them. I’ll remember that for next time, but I’m going to continue my journey into veganism.” 

I want to try incorporating running, yoga and weight lifting this winter. Ideally, I would like to get into the habit of doing something each day. But when I miss a day do I just give up completely? No way! 

Setting big goals are great, but grant yourself some wiggle room. 

What are some exciting goals you've set for yourself this year?

Taking a Break From Caffeine

I decided at the end of November to take a break from caffeine. I settled on a month, who knows, it sounded like a good period of time. 

After I graduated from college I took a year-long break from caffeine as a sort of detox from the copious amounts I consumed in order to keep up with everything. 

But this time around I decided on the month of December 2017.

I wanted to take a break for a few different reasons. 

I was having trouble sleeping through the night, felt really tired in the morning, hit a wall around 2 p.m. and stuff like that.

Lucky for me I decided to go off caffeine at the same time I was sick with a gnarly cold. So, whatever withdrawal symptoms I might have had, like a headache, were all masked by being sicker than a dog to start with. 

I know everyone can't align quitting caffeine with being sick. But it just so happened to work for me. 

I knew what I would miss about it wasn’t the actual caffeine but the morning ritual of making a mug of something warm and taking that back to my office to sip on while I started my morning. 

So, I decided to pick up a few herbal teas. While green and black tea have just as much caffeine as coffee, herbal tea is naturally caffeine free. Woo-hoo!

I first bought a tulsi ginger tea and a sleepy time tea. My mom always has a box of sleepy time tea at her house and I have always liked it for when you need a little something to lull you to sleep.

The sleepy time has chamomile, spearmint and lemongrass. And I love ginger anything.

A few days later I also picked up a tension tamer tea from the same brand as the sleepytime tea. It has eleuthero, peppermint, ginger and lemongrass. 

And my most recent addition is raspberry leaf tea. It doesn’t taste like raspberry (obviously, but worth mentioning because I’m not a fruity tea gal). But it’s supposed to tone your uterus, sooth cramps, and is an overall menstrual supporter. 

I’m a bit surprised it was so easy for me to go a whole month with no caffeine. I’ve taken a few days off from caffeine here or there in the past but always found myself reaching for coffee really quickly. 

I think the trick here was replacing coffee with herbal tea. That way I can get the same sensation without needing the coffee. 

And I think once I can find some vegan hot cocoa mix that will just be an added bonus for something delicious and warm to reach for. 

Who here drinks caffeine? What’s your drink of choice? And who here has given up caffeine before?

[It's January now, and I haven't had that first cup of coffee yet, I'm waiting for the perfect one to come along.]

Discovering Lagom + How It Fits Into My Life

I first discovered hygge and it wasn’t long after that I stumbled upon lagom.

While there is no direct translation from Swedish, I liked the definition “not too little, not too much, just right.” 

I saw someone refer to it as the “Goldilocks" amount. And another said lagom is closer to “optimal”. Overall, it is a lifestyle of balance, sustainability, and frugality. 

For a minimalist like myself, lagom speaks to me. I think a lot of people think minimalism is about owning nothing, living in a destitute house of white walls, a mattress on the floor and one plate and fork. And it couldn’t be further from that. 

While yes there are those that enjoy minimalism in its extreme the vast majority of us look at it as a way to go about life. A conscious choice to be selective about what we let into our lives. Whether that’s physical things, people, experiences. It’s all about refining it down to just what brings you happiness. 

Why bother with the rest everything if it’s just going to clutter up your space and your mind? 

Unlike hygge, lagom isn’t a moment or an experience, it’s much more of an overarching concept to live by. 

When you get down to it, lagom is about striving for a balanced life that can lead you to live in your most natural state. 

Funny enough most Swedes will go “meh” at the mention of lagom because for them its something that means average and boring to them. But the rest of the world is jumping on the lagom train.  

I’m all for taking these concepts like hygge and lagom and finding the aspects of them that speak to me and infusing that into my life to make it all that much better. 

So, here’s the bits of it that speak to me:

Balanced Eating — I’ve never been too strict with what I eat. And the great thing about being vegan is I can eat as much as I want on a whole foods plant-based diet. But there will always be a place in my heart (and my stomach) for sweet things. If I’m focused on getting enough nutrition through fruits, veggies, nuts seeds, grains, etc. then I can have my cake and eat it too! 

Wasting Less — I’ve made some big changes over the past two years when it comes to this. And for the most part, they’re  simple switches. Getting reusable shopping bags, coffee cups, not overbuying on food. I don’t leave the lights on when they’re not needed, or the water running while I brush my teeth. I walk or ride my bike when possible (and it helps not having my own car). I recycle, I reuse, and the amount of trash I produce has dropped drastically. I’m still far from zero waste but I’d love to get there one day. 

Getting Rid of the Excess — Decluttering is one of the most beautiful things I do for myself. It is addicting first off because you have this amazing feeling of lightness and freedom after going through your belongings. And there’s nothing better than having just what you need, and when all of those belongings have a home. Decisions are easier, cleaning is easier. It’s a win, win!

Being a Conscious Consumer — If I want to buy something new it first gets put on my ‘want list’ and it sits there while I research the best option, cost, where I can get it from, whether I can get it second hand, etc. And often times I find that things will sit on my ‘want list’ and eventually I realize, meh I really don’t want/need that and it gets taken off the list. Decluttering was a great way to jump start how I viewed buying stuff. The same goes for starting a capsule wardrobe. 

Creating a Capsule Wardrobe — Speaking of that, it intimidated me at first but once I finally went for it and curated a capsule for each season my mornings have been so much simpler. Why have all of your clothes all together when you probably can’t even wear half of it? This doesn’t mean I’m stuck with only that capsule for the season. If I realize there’s something I need I’ll add it. And it’s a great way to actually see what you need, and what you don’t wear, and can pass along. 

Having a Mindful Work/Life Balance — This one can be tricky regardless of whether you work for someone or you work for yourself. Personally, work and non-work can blend together. Especially since I work from home. But a few things that have really helped is creating a little home office in the corner of our guest bedroom, knowing that “Right, I’m going to sit down to work from 8 -5 today.” I also find that getting ready for work (getting dressed, etc.) helps get me into the mindset. I also don’t jump straight into work in the morning or work up until bedtime either. I make sure I have time before and after my work day to do things for myself. Whether that’s journaling, yoga, meditation, hanging out with friends or family. You need to make time for yourself outside of work. 

Overall, I think there are so many elements of lagom that are already a part of my life. But I’m all for discovering new concepts and finding inspiration in them. And sharing them with you!

Are you into hygge or lagom, or is there another catchy term you are inspired by?